Here's a quick version of Pro Shop 401. Don't worry, my friend, there will not be a test after this one, you are just auditing this course. Is there truly a defense in bowling? In head-to-head match play, there is one form of defense on the PBA National Tour rearing its ugly head every now and then. It has been alleged some of the players with prior High Roller, Eliminator, Team Challenge and 'action' experience will throw practice balls over different parts of the lane not intending to use those particular areas at all for strike shots. Its intent its to give an irregular or spotty read to an opponent's strike ball. Keep in mind, this is just during practice so once the match begins, the 'defender' is left to plow his or her way through what might be described as a spider web of oil lines until they can be burned off. Something similar has been going on for years on the positive side, at least before TV finals on tour. In the days of the one-hour practice session before airtime, players would roll a plastic ball on their intended line for a few shots, creating a bit of oil carrydown, then use their intended strike ball to burn that oil off, creating a drier area or "tube" to build mistake area down the lane. The bigger the target, the easier way to get higher scores as it seems. This would not take into account other players in the same part of the lane, perhaps trying the same thing. If there were, the top seeded player as the final bowler on the pair that day, may see something an entirely different ball reaction than he saw the whole week. That would explain the paultry 40% success rate of a top seed back in the stepladder finals format. Only a few practice shots during the three-minute commercial break to figure out all that, nice. Remember, it was just year ago when Chris Loeschetter took an extremely sanded ball in practice to the very slick oil pattern at the PBA World Championships prior to the TV finals, "burning a hole" as we call it. This allowed him to get a friction area closer to him, allowing a more favorable ball reaction. That was the match Brian Voss walked up to the roving camera and said something about banning sanded bowling balls. For some reason, he did not recognized that area was there, nor did he bother using it for his advantage. I know how slick the fresh pattern was, Tom Hinz and I were paired together (nice bowling at this year's World Championship, by the way) and were both surprised at how others were able to get any ball to read the lane while still carrying strikes at the back end. So why the concern at this stage, you ask? It shows you how tough things are on the exempt tour. Think anything can happen in a one-game match? Looks like anything can happen in a seven-game match, too. Some are trying to get not the cards in their favor, but rather slit the tires, tie shoelaces together, and blindfold the opposition before the race begins. It happens out there, too. At least it isn't steroids. That's all for this portion of Pro Shop 401, now back to the column.

     This year's PBA World Championship at Woodland Bowl, Indianapolis, featured not the level of drama we had seen the previous couple of seasons. Typical for a major tourney, scores were anything but outrageous and grind out seemed to be the rule of the day; take advantage of a good pair and don't get lost on the tougher ones. There was one more regular stop scheduled before the Tournament of Champions, but point list position was the focus once again, especially for those just below the projected cut line for next season's exempt tour. A good showing here, especially with points at 50 % more than the usual value, could almost guarantee an 05-06 exemption. A bad week here could sent you straight to the Tour Trials at the beginning of June. Remember, that's the 45-game in five-day marathon that will send nine bowlers into exempt-status. One bowler who did have a good week was Eugene McCune. He had lost his exemption after last season's tour and was pondering life afterward while bowling PBA Midwest Regional tournaments on the weekends. What he did do was bowl the Tour Qualifiers (known as Rabbit squads in the 70's and 80's), acquiring enough points through higher qualifying finishes to make it for next season. And he did make the round of 32 a time or two. The remainder of the drama was unfolded the following week at the final regular stop in Grand Rapids. Those just on the wrong side of the cut line were looking for one final trip to "the zone" to avoid the physically grueling Tour Trials. Those having to go through again will be Tom Daugherty and David Traber, and Rudy (Revs) Kasimakis. Going for the first time will be Paul Fleming, Chris Johnson, and Dave D'Entremont. Steve Wilson was talking of retiring from the tour, so his status is unknown at presstime.

     What did start to make sense was the PBA's marketing approach taken at the start of the 2002-03 season. Nothing earth-shattering or out of left field, but just a harsh look at the reality of the time. Pop down your $20 or so and find out for yourself in watching the long-awaited DVD release of "League of Ordinary Gentlemen." This was the movie making the film festival circuit last summer documenting the early years of the new PBA and how some of the current stars were reacting and adjusting to how things are now verses the way they were just a few years before. The first 20 minutes or so takes you through how the old PBA was running on financial and marketing fumes by the late 90s (as chronicled more than a couple of times in this column). We also get to meet the four selected players a in a more human light than we see them on the TV finals. The purpose of this project from the former PBA CEO Steve Miller's point of view at the time was any publicity was good publicity. The 'league,' (his word), could not have gone any more backwards as it did. As he will state in the film, a lot of ground was made up that particular year, but a lot of ground lay ahead.

     What the film also tries to show is Steve Miller was the right man for the job-to a point. Certain styles of managing do well in certain phases of development. This organization needed a no nonsense guy to get it not only back on it's feet, but walking, and later running forward. Once the pace of progress changed, a different style was needed to sustain the progress. Miller took the PBA as far as he could. Is the explanation that simple? You be the judge.

     In case you have forgotten, there was another professional sports organization that used to take itself way too seriously. A little over ten years ago, the PGA Tour banned Bill Murray from Pro-Ams at the Bing Crosby tourney at Pebble Beach because of his "behavior detrimental to the game of golf." Interacting with the crowd allowing them to have a good time was almost a crime on former PGA Commissioner Deane Beman's watch. Was he the real life counterpart of Caddyshack's Judge Smails? Pretty close. Once Beman retired, Murray was invited back with open arms. You see it every year on the Saturday SportsCenter highlights. No one gets hurt, no blood is spilled, and thousands of people are laughing and having a good time at no one's expense. And don't get me started on the TV poker tournaments that featured Gabe Kaplan as a commentator. Wow, I never knew the sound of paint drying or grass growing could be so riviting. In today's marketing, packaging and handling is not confined to your local post office

     Oh yes, a reminder. "League" has a R rating for language. Seriously, plenty of language.